Grief & Vulnerability

This year, was the 20th anniversary of my father’s and mother’s passings and it left me feeling incredibly sad and incredibly vulnerable. I have not felt this level of grief since their passing and it was hard to manage, it was hard to manage then and it was hard to manage 20 years later……….

Grief sits within us, in different parts of our body. For me, the main load of my grief sits right in the middle of my chest, my heart, it sits in there and I can feel its vice on it. For others it sits within their stomachs and for some on their skin. This grief is still so alive within me this year, it could be because I lived through a similar (but not) experience that caused my dad’s passing, it could be because it has been 20 yrs. It could be the combination of the 2 in conjunction with the energies of this year but I know it is all of it………

What I have found is that grief is not only tricky for the one going though it but also for the ones you speak with about it. As a society, we have not been taught how to hold someone in compassion while they navigate their grief; to hold someone in pure unconditional love and compassion; to hold them in their vulnerability and pain. I have found the best way to sit and be with someone who is grieving is simply to hold them in love. That is it. No judgement, no trying to fix the problem for them, for there is no problem besides the absence of love that is felt when a loved one crosses over, this is grief.

So please, be there for your loved ones. Sit in the discomfort of their pain with them, I know this isn’t easy but it really does help one heal and has been one of the things that has helped me through this year and 20 yrs prior.

Grief is such a powerful teacher. It reminds us of the love we shared with another.

From My Heart To Yours

Love Deena xXx

Breathe

Breathe 

The world as we have known it is changing minute by minute, hour by hour. We are in times that have never been seen before which can leave some of us feeling overwhelmed, confused, sad, teary and fearful. When you start to feel overwhelmed by news, social media, family, friends, people in the shops etc; Place your hand on your heart and breathe from this space 

Breathe and remember that we are all in this together 

Breathe and remember that we are one 

Do what is right for you and your family but be mindful of the whole 

This gorgeous healing grid has been created to help strengthen our lungs and respiratory system and to help us stay true to ourselves and our hearts. This is so important in these times to be true to ourselves. True to our Divine Loving nature.

Sending You So Much Love

Deena xXx

♥️ You are Fabulous Just the Way You Are ♥️

My dear, you are fabulous just the way you are ♥️

When others say you are too much, you know what I mean. I feel we have all been told this at one time or another. Too loud. Too much. We laugh too much. Our spirit is too upbeat. We are too quiet. Your energy is too high! Too sensitive. Too caring etc etc etc

Oh my lord I am so over this. I am so over people telling others that they are too much because they cannot handle their light and their soul because of their insecurities (yes this is usually why this happens in the first place) I am so tired of people feeling they have a right to even speak these words to another being. How dare we enforce our opinions on others.

We must allow people the space to breathe and be who they are. So that they can learn to be true expression of themselves and of their hearts and souls. We must allow the space for people to meet who they are and if we cannot hold the space for them to do this, we have a choice to walk away in love ♥️ Always in love ♥️ We however, do not have the right to try to make someone small or less than or make them feel they have to change themselves to appease our needs. This is not love.

♥️ Love is the vibration that heals ♥️

When we approach others in love, in this vibration, we all heal and we all learn to see the love and light in each other. We begin to see the love in each other ♥️ we learn that this is our core vibration ♥️ we become compassionate ♥️ and when we do this, those “too muches” become a wonderful thing to behold ♥️

Holding You All in Love ♥️
You are Beautiful and a Divine expression of Love ♥️
From My Heart to Yours
Deena xXx

Life Flows in Cycles

Life flows in cycles 💫
Seasons change 💫
Friends may change 💫
At times it feels as though you are on top of the world and at other times you might feel as though you are clawing your way back to the surface for air 💫
People might misunderstand you and likewise you might misunderstand the intentions or words of others 💫
Life flows in cycles; How we hold ourselves through every moment is key 💫
Stay in the present 💫
Hand on heart, take a deep breath, centre yourself. Be present with your emotions, your feelings, yourself and with others 💫
Ask questions, apologise, ask for help, cry, laugh, rejoice, take a gosh darn nap, be compassionate with yourself and others, honour yourself 💫
Hold yourself in congruence with your heart, hold yourself in integrity and if you mess up or fall, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, make amends, forgive yourself and others, have compassion for yourself and others 💫
Accept where we all are at every moment and allow life to flow through you with creative abandon 💫
Be your own cheerleader and champion. Be the cheerleader and champion for others 💫
And most of all Live, Love, find Peace when you can and cultivate Joy in your life (it is a choice after all) 💫

From My Heart to Yours
So Much Love & Deepest Blessings 
Deena xXx

Choices, Courage & Self Awareness

And through the mist we realise we all have a choice to make.......

Our choices create our reality. This was the theme of a session today with an incredibly beautiful soul but what if your choices are being defined by old beliefs systems and fears? How can you consciously make changes to ensure that you are now making your choices based on your current reality and not on an old one?

The first step is to shine a light on your perceived darkness. To shine a light on your shadows and on your fears. To become aware of them and to become of aware of what triggers them. Dance with them. Get to know them because when you become aware of these things, when you shine on a light on them you can choose to change them. You can choose to act differently. You can choose to change your story, to change the tempo of your life’s music and you can choose to live in a completely fulfilled and aligned manner. You can choose to live in congruence with your heart and your innate beliefs…………all it takes is for you to make the choice and then for you to have the courage to step forward and forge a new path for you ♥️ For this to happen we must first be aware that we are making these choices on a daily basis.

Awareness is key my loves ♥️ Self-Awareness is key ♥️

Are you ready to look within, to meet yourself and all of your gnarliness and to still hold yourself tenderly and compassionately? Are you willing to be the one that helps you to feel safe in this world? I know for me one of my ‘wounds’ is around safety. If I do not feel safe I find it incredibly hard to stay in my heart and make decisions from there. For me I have had to seek refuge within my own heart, not externally. I have had to hold myself so gently and tenderly and at times coax myself back into the light and what this has taught me is that first of all I am always safe when I follow my heart and stay true to my heart; myself ♥️ secondly it has taught me to embrace all aspects of myself especially little Deena who resides within (when your inner child feels safe and loved, life generally flows smoother) ♥️ and thirdly it has taught me that I am a freakin masterpiece and that I have the power to create an amazing life if I so choose ♥️

So what are you choosing for yourself in this moment? Are you choosing a life that is amazing and epic and full of magic? Or are you choosing to stay in the shadows? Whichever it is, know that it is your choice and you have the absolute power to make changes if you so desire ♥️

From My Courageous Heart to Yours
Deena xXx

Fall in Love With Being the Best Version of Yourself

♥️♥️♥️

“Fall in love with the process of becoming the very best version of yourself”

— Shruti Gaja

I love this quote so much because it is so true. Even if it is painful, even if it feels as though you might not make it......when we break through those barriers, self limiting beliefs and own our worth and magnificence and step into our divinity, little by little it makes everything worthwhile ♥️

I like to think of healing like a big balloon. While going through the process the balloon expands and stretches just as how we expand and stretch to our limit and then there is this moment of realisation, healing and wholeness and the balloon is popped, the air released and you guessed it, all of the tension is released. It’s that moment where you exhale into the healing ♥️ 

It is the sweet release in the healing, the knowing and the ultimate wholeness ♥️ and every time you go through a healing you step into the best version of yourself ♥️ 

Of course this doesn’t only happen in healings, we have EVERY DAY and EVERY MOMENT to be THE VERY BEST VERSION of ourselves but when you break through a big belief or limitation that has been holding you back for so long you do feel this sense of relief, compassion and pure love for yourself and your journey ♥️

Much Love to You All
Deena xXx

New Year, New Word, New Theme.....maybe?

Happy New Year!

I am not the type of person to make resolutions, I never have been, I tried a couple of times but I always ‘failed’ pretty soon after they were made and then I felt like crap so I gave up on them pretty quickly and instead just focussed on what type of person I wanted to be for the year, kind, generous, loving etc you get the idea.

This has evolved into me choosing a word that reflects the main lesson or idea of how I want to live my life for the year ahead. My word last year was TRUST and the Universe provided me with many ways to build trust within myself and with others and with the Universe itself. It was a remarkable year of learning and tending to my wounds and loving them and myself while I healed.

This year my word is EMERGE and I am truly excited to see what magic the year ahead holds.

You might be wondering how I came about my word for the year. It’s pretty easy and anyone can do it. I thought about 2018 and the overall feeling I had throughout the year and the lessons I learnt. I thought about what worked for me and what didn’t work and I sat with all of those feelings for a while, the good, the bad, the ugly, the joyous, the magical, the loving feelings…..I sat with them all and allowed myself to feel them all and give gratitude to them and when I felt complete with this stage, I allowed myself to imagine how I want to feel in 2019, all the things I want to accomplish for this year, in my personal life, my business life, my financial life, my family life; in every aspect of my life and as I was dreaming up this life for me I was shown how in 2018 I was in a cocoon, going through a metamorphosis of sorts, a healing and the more I dreamed up what I wanted my life to be like, the more I could feel myself coming out of this cocoon, emerging and spreading my wings. Funnily though, the word came to me days later as I only just saw this vision while in meditation.

If you have not done so as yet or have never thought of finding a word/theme for your year ahead I would encourage you to try it out. Please know there are no hard rules on this, you can have a phrase, you can have more than one word even! It is entirely up to you. You might even have chosen a theme or word for last year and you feel you have not completed it. It just feels incomplete…….guess what? You can have that word again as your word for this year! Listen to Your SOUL, it will let you know what it is you are needing.

So here are my simple steps:

1. find some quiet time to yourself and centre yourself

2. look back on 2018 and take stock of all that occurred in it. The good , the bad, the incredible, the ugly and the magical and find their lessons. You may want to write this all down.

3. give thanks to 2018 for those lessons - they helped you on your way

4. think about how you want to feel in 2019

5. start to imagine and dream your life in 2019

6. allow your word or theme to come through. Listen to YOUR SOUL

7. write it down! What does this word mean to you?

8. you can create a vision board with this word in the centre or on the top

9. live your life to the fullest. Throughout the year come back to this word, ask yourself if your actions are contributing towards it

10. Create Magic!

I hope this has helped and that you can find your perfect word/theme/phrase for the year.

Time To Shine

I sat at my computer to update some information on my site and thought to myself, I wonder if I have a blog in me and I have to admit that I really wasn't sure I did but as soon as I thought, I'm not sure I was given was the title......Time To Shine. So here it is.....

What does this meant to me, Time to Shine? Is it time for me to shine? Time for you to shine? Time for us all to shine? When I feel into it, it is all of them! It is simply time for us to stop hiding in the shadows and to open up our heart and our lives to the immense possibilities that lie before us. I do offer a word of caution here though as not all possibilities/opportunities are equal and therefore not all should be taken up as some will be like a test to see exactly where your resolve, trust and faith lie and others will be so sweet and so beautiful that you know from the instant it is uttered to you that you are in 100%  

So how do you know if this possibility that has been presented to you is going to allow you to shine your light in the way that feels aligned and authentic to you? You need to stop and be in the silence and allow your heart to speak to you. Allow it to send you the messages that are authentic to you. Listening to and following your heart will ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS allow you to SHINE!!

Photo by Brigitte Tohm from Pexels

Here's a little exercise on how I listen to my heart, even when I am feeling overwhelmed. First of all I talk it out or write it out. I am one of those people who needs to speak or write out all of my feelings on the subject, to let all the "noise" out so that I can sit in silence and connect in with my heart. This doesn't mean that I cannot connect in before I clear the noise but I have found that this is the best way for me to be as clear as possible, as quiet as possible which makes the connection with my heart as loud as possible. When there are still emotions running around, I can only hear little whispers, when I am quiet and still I can hear the roar of my heart, its needs, desires and direction. 

To Connect In With Your Heart

1. place your hand on your heart and take a few deep, relaxing and cleansing breaths
2. draw your attention to your heart and feel the love you have for it building
3. meet your heart, that Divine place within
4. ask the question you need clarification on eg "Divine Heart of mine, is this opportunity <<Insert opportunity>>> right for me in this moment? Will this opportunity allow my heart to soar and my light to shine? Will it keep me on my path?"
5. Wait for the answer, it may come as a feeling, as a thought, as a sound, a scent, an animal messenger or you might just know automatically what it is
6. Once you have received your message always give thanks and send love

I know this might sound a little odd, connecting in with your own heart in this way but this is your Sacred Heart you are connecting into, your Anahata and as such, you therefore need to honour it as the sacred being it is. 

From My Heart to Yours

Deena xXx

When I See You Smile

I woke up this morning with this song in my head, 'When I see You Smile' just those words really and I thought about those words and let them become a part of me.

A smile is such a precious gift that we can give someone, whether it be a stranger or a friend or family member. It lights up another's world just by being a smile. It lights our world up simply by smiling. You cannot deny that a beautiful smile whether from yourself or another makes you feel good inside.

"Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing" ~ Mother Teresa

According to scientist Andrew Newberg, a smile is the “the symbol that was rated with the highest positive emotional content” Now that's pretty cool! 

So here's a bit of science on smiling, it's pretty simple really, when you see someone from the past or something pleasurable, endorphins (happy hormones) are produced and neuronal signals travel from the cortex of your brain to the brainstem (the oldest part of our brains). From there, the cranial muscle carries the signal further towards the smiling muscles in your face. Once the smiling muscles in our face contract, there is a positive feedback loop that goes back to the brain and reinforces our feeling of joy. In other words, smiling stimulates the rewards mechanism in our brain! So when we feel good our brain tells us to smile, then when we smile we tell our brain it is feeling good and the loop repeats itself. 

Smiling reduces stress that your body and mind feel and helps to generate more positive emotions within you. That’s why we often feel happier around children because they smile more. On average, children smile 400 times a day. In contrast to happy adults who smile 40-50 times a day. However, statistically, the average adult only smiles about 20 times in one day. What happened to our 380 other smiles? When and why did we stop smiling so much? When and why did we allow society and conditioning to break us and enrol us into thinking that smiling only 20 times a day is acceptable for our well-being?

When I read this statistic I will admit I got really angry. How in the name of all that is good can we live like this and think it is ok? Yes I know there are stresses in this world and hurts and heartaches and grief and loss and so much to not smile about BUT, and here is my BUT there is so much to smile about as well eg the smile of your children, a beautiful butterfly fluttering past you, the sun shining its warmth on you or the rain nourishing the earth, plants and animals. How about a song that makes you feel good inside or evokes an amazing memory? There is so much smile worthy goodness in this world.............As I look out the window, there is dappled sun coming through the window and blinds and it is making a beautiful pattern on my sofa, this simple thing makes me smile.

So my loves, are you ready to embrace the good and the beauty that is around you? Are you ready to seek it out, find it, feel it and express it and in turn release some happy hormones in your life and possibly in the life of another? Because as we know smiles are contagious!